No rest for the weary...
After my visit to the hospital for my seizures, I was prescribed Keppra. Keppra is an anti-seizure medication. While it is effective, it can come with some side effects that aren't the greatest. In my particular case, it makes me irritable. It's a weird experience to recognize that your mind isn't functioning like normal. I'm a fairly calm and mellow individual by nature, but after starting on Keppra, I was able to notice a difference in the way my mind was working. Kim could notice it too. And it was exhausting trying to mentally work through the issues I was dealing with.
On April 28th, I visited with a neurologist. In my last post, I talk about that visit and how frustrating it was. However, he prescribed me vitamin B6 to help with the irritability that Keppra can bring. I was looking forward to getting started on that to help me through what was going on. A few days after that visit, we picked up my prescription and I was able to start taking the vitamin B6 to help me through the Keppra.
Unfortunately, as I would come to find out, the side effects of the vitamin B6 would be far, far worse than the mild irritability the Keppra was inducing.
The night of Tuesday, May 5th, I was exhausted. The past several nights I had hardly slept. My nights generally went like this...
Sleep really well until 2 am.
Lie awake in bed until my alarm goes off at 5:45 am.
Roughly 4 hours of sleep.
That had happened for several nights in a row and I was exhausted. I was so looking forward to climbing in bed and passing out from exhaustion. Since I woke up at 2:30 am on Tuesday, I had taken a short nap in the hyperbaric oxygen chamber for about 30 minutes, but that's all. After several nights of little sleep, I needed my bed.
Then it happened...
I climbed in bed at 9:20 pm and...nothing. I would occasionally check the clock to see what time it was. 10:15 pm. 11:45 pm. 12:30 am. 1:45 am. 2:20 am. Here I was, exhausted out of my mind, but I couldn't sleep. At all. I've had rough nights before, but it's usually because my mind latches onto something and I can't stop thinking. This, however, was different. I wasn't thinking about anything. I wasn't stressed. It was like my brain was just sitting there, humming along, doing nothing. No matter how much I relaxed and breathed, my brain wouldn't shut off. And so, I didn't sleep. At all.
Despite several nights of little sleep and currently being in the middle of a completely sleepless night, God stepped in and provided me with a tender mercy. He provided me with a thought. And that thought was... "It's the vitamin B6."
When I dragged myself out of bed at about 5:30 am for my morning scripture study, I was beyond exhausted. It had been 27 hours since I woke up at 2:30 am the prior morning and I didn't know how I was going to function. But I've learned one thing in this life and that is to show forth gratitude. As I sat down in the office to read my scriptures, I made sure to thank my Heavenly Father for a warm bed to climb in, for a home that offers protection, and for the opportunity I had to rest, despite not being able to sleep. I also thanked Him for that thought. I prayed for the energy to get through the day and then jumped into my gospel study.
After my studies, I started looking into side effects of vitamin B6. I found what I needed. A study had shown that individuals taking 240 mg of vitamin B6 reported a significant decline in quality of sleep. While I was only taking 100 mg, I was consuming a lot of foods that provided natural sources of vitamin B6. I resolved to stop taking the vitamin I had been prescribed.
That day, despite being tired the entire day, was a great day. My mind was able to focus during family scripture study and during work. I was able to enjoy time with my wife and family. Amazingly, when I climbed into bed that evening, I turned on the TV to watch some shows INSTEAD of falling asleep right away. Ironic, right? Kim was shocked lol
I ended up going to bed just before 10 pm and I believe I got about 6 hours of solid sleep. That was the most I had enjoyed in over 5 nights. After waking up well before my alarm, I wasn't able to fall back asleep, but I'd had a good night. The following night, Thursday night, was even better. Then, last night, Friday night, I went to bed and got almost 10 hours of excellent sleep. All the while the irritability from the Keppra is gone.
That thought that I had in the middle of my sleepless night was an answer to my prayers. It provided me with the guidance I needed.
God is intimately aware of our needs and He is willing to bless each of us. No matter how much I prayed night after night for a good night's rest, it never came. That night without sleep, I repeatedly prayed in desperation for some rest. It never came. But in God's infinite wisdom and through His mercy, He answered my prayers. He provided me with the knowledge that I needed to make a slight adjustment in my life that would enable me to get the rest that I needed. You see, God answers prayers, it's just not always the way we want them to be answered. As He provides us with what we need, He hopes that we will act in faith on what He has provided. I testify that He lives and He loves us. If we look for the tender mercies in our lives, we will find them. If we act in faith on the promptings we receive, blessings will come. The slightest adjustments in our lives can lead to the biggest changes in who we are and the way our lives look.
This life is hard. At times, there's no rest for the weary. But we have been promised that rest will come. Maybe not in this life, but it will come. We have been promised, if we are faithful, rest for eternity in the Celestial Kingdom with our Heavenly Father and our Savior, Jesus Christ. Learn to dance through the storms of life and peace and joy can permeate every moment of this life.
On April 28th, I visited with a neurologist. In my last post, I talk about that visit and how frustrating it was. However, he prescribed me vitamin B6 to help with the irritability that Keppra can bring. I was looking forward to getting started on that to help me through what was going on. A few days after that visit, we picked up my prescription and I was able to start taking the vitamin B6 to help me through the Keppra.
Unfortunately, as I would come to find out, the side effects of the vitamin B6 would be far, far worse than the mild irritability the Keppra was inducing.
The night of Tuesday, May 5th, I was exhausted. The past several nights I had hardly slept. My nights generally went like this...
Sleep really well until 2 am.
Lie awake in bed until my alarm goes off at 5:45 am.
Roughly 4 hours of sleep.
That had happened for several nights in a row and I was exhausted. I was so looking forward to climbing in bed and passing out from exhaustion. Since I woke up at 2:30 am on Tuesday, I had taken a short nap in the hyperbaric oxygen chamber for about 30 minutes, but that's all. After several nights of little sleep, I needed my bed.
Then it happened...
I climbed in bed at 9:20 pm and...nothing. I would occasionally check the clock to see what time it was. 10:15 pm. 11:45 pm. 12:30 am. 1:45 am. 2:20 am. Here I was, exhausted out of my mind, but I couldn't sleep. At all. I've had rough nights before, but it's usually because my mind latches onto something and I can't stop thinking. This, however, was different. I wasn't thinking about anything. I wasn't stressed. It was like my brain was just sitting there, humming along, doing nothing. No matter how much I relaxed and breathed, my brain wouldn't shut off. And so, I didn't sleep. At all.
Despite several nights of little sleep and currently being in the middle of a completely sleepless night, God stepped in and provided me with a tender mercy. He provided me with a thought. And that thought was... "It's the vitamin B6."
When I dragged myself out of bed at about 5:30 am for my morning scripture study, I was beyond exhausted. It had been 27 hours since I woke up at 2:30 am the prior morning and I didn't know how I was going to function. But I've learned one thing in this life and that is to show forth gratitude. As I sat down in the office to read my scriptures, I made sure to thank my Heavenly Father for a warm bed to climb in, for a home that offers protection, and for the opportunity I had to rest, despite not being able to sleep. I also thanked Him for that thought. I prayed for the energy to get through the day and then jumped into my gospel study.
After my studies, I started looking into side effects of vitamin B6. I found what I needed. A study had shown that individuals taking 240 mg of vitamin B6 reported a significant decline in quality of sleep. While I was only taking 100 mg, I was consuming a lot of foods that provided natural sources of vitamin B6. I resolved to stop taking the vitamin I had been prescribed.
That day, despite being tired the entire day, was a great day. My mind was able to focus during family scripture study and during work. I was able to enjoy time with my wife and family. Amazingly, when I climbed into bed that evening, I turned on the TV to watch some shows INSTEAD of falling asleep right away. Ironic, right? Kim was shocked lol
I ended up going to bed just before 10 pm and I believe I got about 6 hours of solid sleep. That was the most I had enjoyed in over 5 nights. After waking up well before my alarm, I wasn't able to fall back asleep, but I'd had a good night. The following night, Thursday night, was even better. Then, last night, Friday night, I went to bed and got almost 10 hours of excellent sleep. All the while the irritability from the Keppra is gone.
That thought that I had in the middle of my sleepless night was an answer to my prayers. It provided me with the guidance I needed.
God is intimately aware of our needs and He is willing to bless each of us. No matter how much I prayed night after night for a good night's rest, it never came. That night without sleep, I repeatedly prayed in desperation for some rest. It never came. But in God's infinite wisdom and through His mercy, He answered my prayers. He provided me with the knowledge that I needed to make a slight adjustment in my life that would enable me to get the rest that I needed. You see, God answers prayers, it's just not always the way we want them to be answered. As He provides us with what we need, He hopes that we will act in faith on what He has provided. I testify that He lives and He loves us. If we look for the tender mercies in our lives, we will find them. If we act in faith on the promptings we receive, blessings will come. The slightest adjustments in our lives can lead to the biggest changes in who we are and the way our lives look.
This life is hard. At times, there's no rest for the weary. But we have been promised that rest will come. Maybe not in this life, but it will come. We have been promised, if we are faithful, rest for eternity in the Celestial Kingdom with our Heavenly Father and our Savior, Jesus Christ. Learn to dance through the storms of life and peace and joy can permeate every moment of this life.
#FaithOverFear
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